In a deeply personal and revealing interview, Conservative leader, Kemi Badenoch, has spoken for the first time about the tragic loss of a family member who died by suicide after being drawn into disturbing online ideologies.
The emotional disclosure came as Badenoch was forced to defend herself during a recent appearance on ‘BBC Breakfast’ for not having watched ‘Adolescence’, a Netflix drama about a teenage boy who fatally stabs a female classmate.
Hosts Charlie Stayt and Naga Munchetty seemed shocked by her admission, suggesting the show raised important issues such as toxic masculinity, school smartphone use, cyberbullying, and the online incel movement.
Badenoch responded sharply: “Just as I don’t need to watch ‘Casualty’ to understand the NHS, I don’t need a fictional drama to grasp these issues.”
But beneath that assertive exterior lies a painful personal experience. In an exclusive conversation at a London hotel, Badenoch revealed the devastating impact the internet had on her own family.
“I worry deeply about social media,” she said. “A relative of mine, in his 20s, got lost in an online ‘rabbit hole.’ He became consumed by philosophies like pro-mortalism and anti-natalism—and ended up taking his life.”
Pro-mortalism and anti-natalism are bleak ideologies that advocate against human existence and reproduction to prevent suffering. Badenoch admitted she had never heard of them before the tragedy.
“He was living alone in Canada and left behind a detailed and heartbreaking suicide note describing how he descended into the dark web,” she said, visibly emotional.
“It was disturbingly rational and articulate—but he ended his life. It broke our hearts.”
This is the first time Badenoch has publicly shared the 2022 family tragedy, which has left a lasting impression on her views about internet regulation and online safety.
“This isn’t just about protecting children—adults, too, can become dangerously addicted,” she added.
The traumatic experience has prompted her to seriously consider stricter regulations, including possibly banning social media for children under 16, following Australia’s lead.
“It’s something we’re looking into as part of our policy review,” she said.
Despite her concern about digital dangers, she admitted she occasionally scrolls through funny videos on Instagram—sometimes for 30 minutes at a stretch.
“If it’s that addictive for adults, what chance do kids have?” she asked.
However, as she seeks to enact any policy changes, Badenoch faces the uphill battle of winning power first.
After five months as Conservative leader, her party is still lagging in the polls. A recent YouGov survey placed the Tories at 21%, with Labour slightly ahead at 24%, and Nigel Farage’s Reform UK close behind at 23%.
There is growing speculation that Badenoch could face a leadership challenge if next month’s local elections result in major losses. Although she has firmly ruled out any alliance or merger with Reform, she remains tight-lipped about their growing popularity.
“Yes, I will ‘reform’ the Civil Service—but I’m not focused on other parties right now,” she joked.
On immigration and integration, Badenoch took a firm stance: *“Multiculturalism is failing. People who come to the UK must adopt British values, not try to change them.”
She revealed plans to launch a new policy commission aimed at tackling the long-standing challenges around integration.
Among other things, the group will examine why public money is spent on translation services instead of encouraging migrants to learn English.
According to a Conservative source, the commission’s members may surprise some observers, hinting at a more diverse mix than typical Tory panels.
Badenoch questioned whether newcomers to the UK are contributing to national success:
“Do they want to see Britain thrive—or just benefit from what’s available here?”
She also criticised past governments for paying grants to so-called ‘community leaders’ in efforts to promote cohesion, saying: “That approach isn’t working. Nihilism is spreading.”
She pointed to the case of Southport killer Axel Rudakubana as a warning sign.
“He was the child of asylum seekers. He should have embraced this country—but instead, he took a nihilistic path,” she said.
“Some say it’s not the government’s responsibility to ensure migrants integrate—but look what happened with the grooming gangs. We ignored the warning signs.”
While Badenoch herself is seen by some as a successful example of integration, she’s aware of the criticism from certain quarters on the right, who question whether a British-Nigerian is the right person to lead conversations about immigration.
Asked whether she believes some voters may reject her because of her race, she replied: “There will always be people like that. But I hate identity politics. Your skin colour should matter no more than your hair or eye colour. We were moving past all that—until this movement emerged.”
She was referring to the post-2020 surge in activism, particularly following the Black Lives Matter protests.
Badenoch cited a report by the Wildlife and Countryside Link, which labelled the British countryside as a “racist, colonial white space,” as an example of the excessive narrative.
“It’s absurd,” she said. “Now everything’s labelled racist. The backlash to this kind of thinking has actually created more division. But I’m ready to confront it head-on.”
Representing North West Essex, Badenoch noted that many of her constituents have moved out of places like East London, feeling alienated in their own communities. “People tell me it’s not the place they grew up in anymore,” she said.
Badenoch, born Olukemi Olufunto Adegoke in Wimbledon in 1980, has a unique backstory.
Her mother, a Nigerian professor of physiology, was receiving treatment for endometriosis in London when she gave birth.
Coincidentally, her husband Hamish was born in the same Catholic clinic just a year earlier.
Raised in Lagos, her childhood was shaped by faith and family. Her grandfather was a Methodist minister, and she attended a girls’ Christian school, where hymns and church activities were central.
“I was a tenor in the choir,” she laughed. “My voice was much deeper than the other girls’.”
A former school debating champion, she devoured Enid Blyton books—stories she now reads to her three children.
The Adegoke family lived comfortably above her father’s medical practice, supported by domestic staff.
“It wasn’t Downton Abbey,” she said, “but we had help, and extended family often stayed with us.”
That relative comfort ended when a military coup and oil crisis in 1985 devastated the Nigerian economy.
“I saw people lose everything. That’s why I fear reckless economic policies.”
She recalled having to study by candlelight and fetching water in rusted buckets from a distant borehole.
“You can have natural resources, but without good governance, you’ll waste them.”
Her early experiences help explain her skepticism about the Labour government’s push for Net Zero policies.
“When I moved to Britain at 16 with just £100, having reliable electricity was like a miracle. Many Brits have no idea what it’s like not knowing if the power will work. I never want this country to go through that.”
Her mother encouraged her to move to the UK to continue her education after prolonged university strikes in Nigeria halted progress.
While studying for her A-levels at a college in Morden, southwest London, Kemi Badenoch took a job at McDonald’s, where she indulged in a Quarter Pounder every single day for a year and a half.
“I can’t even look at them now,” she laughs, though she allows her children to enjoy one now and then as a treat.
“I loved earning money, but it definitely distracted me from studying.” The outcome? A D in Maths and Bs in Chemistry and Biology.
“My father was livid,” she recalls. “The college didn’t push me hard enough. I had dreams of becoming a doctor—they told me to consider nursing. It was a classic case of low expectations based on bias.”
She went on to study Computer Engineering at Sussex University, but it wasn’t all smooth sailing. “Brighton was great—but the campus was full of North London lefties,” she said.
Sussex later made headlines in 2021 when Professor Kathleen Stock was hounded out by activists over accusations of ‘transphobia.’
When asked about this week’s Supreme Court judgment defining the legal meaning of “woman,” Badenoch lights up: “It was a hallelujah moment. Internally, I was punching the air.”
She reflects on university life, saying gender identity debates didn’t exist back then, but there was a heavy Marxist influence on campus discussions.
“There was an exaggerated anti-colonial narrative. Africans were portrayed as powerless victims, with students seeing themselves as their saviours,” she said.
“This is the same ideology we see driving Labour MPs today. David Lammy and Keir Starmer are still behaving like university student leaders.”
Her own political leanings were always clear: “Margaret Thatcher was my hero—an extraordinary woman.”
Badenoch joined the Conservative Party in 2005 and backed David Davis over David Cameron in the leadership race.
Although she arrived early for our interview, critics often accuse her of tardiness.
“They also say I’m lazy and not a morning person,” she says with a grin. “I usually go to bed around 1 a.m. and manage on six hours’ sleep. That’s about all you can expect with young kids. I’m looking forward to when they’re teens and start sleeping in!”
Dressed in her signature style—a blue dress from The Fold, retailing at £400—she pairs it with white heels from Marks & Spencer costing just £30.
Her hairstyle is a time investment. “It takes four hours every six weeks to get my hair plaited,” she says. “I take a ton of paperwork to the salon.”
She admits she couldn’t manage her demanding role without her husband Hamish, who stepped back from a lucrative job at Deutsche Bank after she succeeded Robert Jenrick as party leader.
Now overseeing investment portfolios and often working from home, Hamish handles most of the household responsibilities, including the cooking.
“Although I did cook last Saturday,” she beams. “Chicken in tomato sauce. First time in ages!”
The pair first met at a Conservative Party event in 2009 when she was a candidate for Dulwich.
Was it love at first sight? “No,” she laughs, “more like instant suspicion!”
She assumed he was just another posh public schoolboy looking to steal her seat.
“Our relationship developed gradually. I wouldn’t be where I am today without Hamish. He calls me out when needed.”
“I know I can come off as harsh or flippant. Hamish helps me soften my delivery. During the leadership race, people said I was too combative, too sharp. He’s helped me tone it down.”
She acknowledges how little time she spends with their children.
“My five-year-old told me this morning, ‘Mummy, tell the Prime Minister you’re not going in today.’”
Her son, meanwhile, is more focused on football and supports Crystal Palace with his dad.
Looking ahead to the May 1 by-election in Runcorn, along with mayoral and county elections, Badenoch is preparing for turbulence. She’s fully aware her party has cycled through five leaders since 2019.
“There was a time when knocking on doors with a blue rosette meant people instantly knew what we stood for—even if they disagreed,” she says. “By 2024, under Rishi Sunak, the message had become muddled.”
She’s determined to restore traditional Conservative values. “If we can bring back clear, authentic principles, this obsession with changing leaders will fade. We’re at a critical juncture.”
Regarding her appearances at Prime Minister’s Questions, she’s candid: “At first, I treated it like a courtroom—presenting data and analysis—but it didn’t connect. Now I understand it’s part theatre, part debate. I’m learning to blend both.”
Critics have called her stiff, lazy, and destined to fail. But the reality? She’s intelligent, charismatic, and bold.
